Skip to main content

“Why Did My Ex Break Up With Me?” The REAL Truth Your Ex Is Hiding

 Have you been wondering WHY your ex broke up with you?

Like, what was the REAL reason?

That’s a question that almost everyone asks themselves after they’ve been dumped. It’s only natural.

You want to know so that you can FIX those things, and hopefully get back together, right? Or maybe you’re more in the “seeking closure so I can move on” mindset.

Below, I’m going to tell you the REAL answer to this question. I’ll explain the TRUE reason for your breakup that your ex will NEVER tell you.

The Truth About Why Your Ex Broke Up With You

First, there’s a couple of crucial facts I need to share with you. The last of these facts is absolutely CRITICAL and something most people never even consider…

FACT #1: Your Ex Lied To You, or Hid Part of The Truth.

I’ve been a breakup coach for more than a decade, and I’ve worked with literally thousands of clients from 131 countries win back their ex or get over a breakup… and one thing I’ve learned during that time is this…

Exes lie.

In fact, I’d even go so far as to say that this is pretty much universal. Your ex is just NOT going to tell you the full truth about why they decided to break up with you.

your ex had a secret affair

Sometimes that means your ex will tell you a half-truth and withhold the full story, but often it will just be a flat-out lie.

Regardless, it’s safe to say that if your ex DID say anything about their reasoning behind the breakup, you can’t assume that’s the only reason or the REAL reason.

There are 2 reasons for this:

  • Your ex wanted to avoid hurting you by telling you the painful truth (like, for instance, they’re secretly leaving you for your best friend or because you’ve gained 140 pounds in the past 3 months)
  • They just don’t want to get into another big fight or drawn-out, drama-filled discussion about it.

FACT #2: There’s No ‘Silver Bullet’ That You Can Fix To Make Your Ex Take You Back.

Look, I think you can probably figure this out on your own, but let me spell it out just in case:

There’s no one thing you can change or fix that will suddenly change your ex’s mind.

Even if a big reason they dumped you was because of something tangible and easily fixable — they hated your friends, for instance — simply making that issue disappear is almost never enough by itself to reverse a breakup and go back to a happy, loving couple again.

man grovelling on knees to woman

Bending over backward for your ex is the complete opposite of what you should be doing if you want them back.

You don’t want your ex to think you’re so desperate and heartbroken that you’re willing to change for them.

Even if you miss your ex so badly you can hardly breatheDO NOT try to tell your ex that you’ll change and things will be different if they’ll give you another chance. That will make matters much worse, trust me.

What does this mean for you?

It means that, generally speaking, learning the REAL reasons behind your ex’s decision to break up won’t really help you much if you want to win them back.

FACT #3: Getting “Closure” Is Not Really Going To Make You Feel Any Better

OK, if you’re not that interested in getting your ex back… or if you’ve basically given up trying… then maybe you just want some “closure” from your ex so that you can flip the page and start a new chapter in life.

Newsflash: it ain’t happening!

That closure doesn’t really exist, or at least not in the way you might think. Sometimes, hashing things out with an ex can maybe make you feel a bit better or help you learn how to do things differently in future relationships… but generally, the idea of “getting closure after a breakup” is a myth.

cowboy riding into sunset

And guess what happens when you sit down and talk things over with your ex? You start thinking about them again, and that brings up all of those memories and emotions… If you’re trying to move on or even just push your ex out of our mind to numb the pain, getting “closure” will quite literally achieve the exact opposite.

OK, there’s one more fact I want to share, and this one is the most important one…. And the one that most people — including a lot of other so-called “breakup gurus” — really fail to understand or appreciate.

FACT #4: Even Your Ex Doesn’t Actually Know The Full Truth.

Yes, you heard me… in most cases, your ex won’t actually really fully know why they want to break up with you. Before you write me off as a lunatic here, let me explain, ok?

Humans are emotionally-driven creatures.

You might think you are in control of your feelings and behaviors, but you’re really driven by a series of chemical and hormonal changes in your brain… these hormones and neurons firing inside your head are what make you fall in love, feel betrayed, feel happy, feel heartbroken… it all boils down to chemical reactions inside the brain.

your ex is confused

Now, most of the time, that’s irrelevant. Who cares what the actual mechanism behind your heartache is, right?

It hurts regardless of what’s causing it, which hormones are out of balance and all that science crap…

Except, wait for a second… think about it… your ex is human, right? I’m assuming so.

And remember how I mentioned earlier that falling in love is actually the result of certain hormones in the brain?

Oxytocin is the main hormone, in fact, that’s responsible for feelings of love and affection. And, back when your ex was crazy in love with you, in the ‘golden phase’ of your relationship, your ex’s brain was releasing a TON of oxytocin and other similar hormones like dopamine and serotonin.

And, when your ex started to fall out of love…. When they were no longer attracted to you in the same way as they used to be…. Their brain just wasn’t producing those hormones anymore. What were the triggers that led to this?

Was it stagnation and boredom, or was it really those 20 pounds you put on after you started dating? It’s likely a combination of many factors, and your ex won’t even know the true extent of the reasons.

Now, if you are trying to get back together with your ex… well, this is the part where I get to give you some great news:

You now have a fool-proof recipe for making them fall back in love with you!

If you can bring back the oxytocin and trigger those same hormones that led to them falling for you in the first place, the exact same thing is going to happen again… and there’s quite literally NOTHING they can do to stop it from happening.

brain chemicals

As I said, we’re all at the mercy of our brain chemistry, and nothing on this planet can stop your ex from feeling in love with you if their brain is flooded with oxytocin and all the chemicals that cause us to feel affection and attraction…

No rational, logical reason your ex could think up would ever be enough to overpower their fundamental brain chemistry.

In other words, it doesn’t matter what their reasons were for the breakup… if you can stimulate those love hormones like oxytocin, you’ll build real, organic attraction and your ex will fight to have you by their side, regardless of how many times they’ve told you “we’re never getting back together.”

Like I said, we’re all at the mercy of our hormones.

Popular posts from this blog

7 Tips On Texting A Girl You Like (And Get Her To Hang Out)

So you got her number and you’re happy. You’re stoked, even. In fact, you’re so excited that you grab for your phone, text her name in, and then pause … You pause because you have no idea to  what to say . And you really, really don’t want to blow this one since you do   really like her. But what do you say? Texting Is a Different Ballgame Don’t text like this, dude. First of all, let me tell you that if you think you’re good with women, it doesn’t mean crap in the texting world.   You could be the smoothest playa ever and just suck at knowing what to text a girl. Why? Well, there’s a couple reasons. First of all, in real life, when you’re interacting with a girl, you have the ability to touch   a girl. If you’re any good at knowing  how to pick up a girl or turn her on , then you’ll know that this is absolutely crucial. And secondly, trying to woo a girl over the phone is completely different as well — over the phone, you have the luxury of conveying emotions in your v

The Single Man’s Guide To Dressing For A Night Out

(COVID-19 Fluid protection plate) Face Shield, 10 Pcs Anti-fog Full Safety Face Shield, Universal Reusable Face Protective Visor for Eye Head Protection, Anti-Spitting Splash Facial Cover for Women, Men(Get it in 6-12 days) [COVID-19] Gentlemen, take heed: What you wear out for a night on the town can make a big difference to two things: Your interactions with the fairer sex  (your ability to pick up women / possibly end up in a girl’s bed). Your own self-confidence and how others perceive you  (your ability to chat with people and be socially successful). Why? It’s simple, really, and it all boils down to perceptions. Your outfit says a lot about you and your personality whether you like it or not. It’s like a personal statement that you wear (quite literally) around town. Before you even say hello, people will evaluate you (and come to conclusions about you and your personality) based on the information they have available. Clothes — a Kind of Name Tag Since you’

How To Make A Man Fall Madly In Love With You - 10 Tips For Making Men Desire You More

  "Be the flame, not the moth." - Giacomo Casanova We all want to be loved. It's a human need - we yearn for that magical connection with The One Person meant for each of us. You might be on the lookout for that guy right now, just as he's searching for someone like you. Or maybe you're already in a relationship and you want to keep the flames of passion burning ferociously bright with your man. Either way, you'd do well to learn the secrets to turning him on like crazy. If you can make him feel things he's never felt with any other woman before, then he's as good as YOURS. Meet Tina She was like most women who stumbled in the dark when it came to men and dating. Tina, a real estate agent from Surrey, had trouble keeping a guy around. Either he "needed space", wasn't "ready commit to something long-term" or had some equally lame excuse available. So she jumped from one relationship to the next and fell into the same patterns ove